Being in a relationship on its own can be complicated, and it takes a lot of effort to build and maintain it. Since a close friendship and your relationship are at stake, you might get scared and struggle to find a solution. Make your choice clear. Regardless of how direct or indirect the best friend is in his interest, show him who your choice is and that you are committed to it. When you, your boyfriend and his best friend are hanging out, make sure to always be closer to your boyfriend and pay attention to him only.
Turn down his flirty moves. This will only give him the wrong impression. Dating the guy your best friend likes, keep your distance and reply kindly but briefly and without much enthusiasm. Try to keep physical contact to a minimum. If he always goes for a cordial hug, try extending your hand next time for a handshake.
If he randomly touches your shoulder or arm in the middle of a conversation, gently move backward to point out your discomfort or use body language: Keep an emotional distance by avoiding personal topics. Avoid opening up to him about deep, emotional issues you might have, at least until after he gets over you.
Instead, stick to small talk and topics that are relevant to him and your boyfriend together. Ignore the situation and keep your distance. You might be Dating the guy your best friend likes that if you verbalize the situation to your boyfriend or to his best friend, things might get weird or their friendship might get hurt. Distance yourself from the friend and keep your relationship with him cordial but reserved, and over time he might get the clue that he has no shot with you.
Ask to talk with the best friend. Or perhaps he has already confessed his feelings for you, in which case you have no option but to give a response. In either case, ask to talk in private with him, although you might want to choose a public place and not one of your rooms in order to avoid giving a wrong impression. You could also bring it up when he makes a flirty move, such as when he compliments you or asks to an activity with you alone.
Tell the friend how you feel.
Start by saying how his moves make you feel: Be kind and stay on good terms. Keeping this in mind, keep your conversation polite and friendly, and emphasize that you Dating the guy your best friend likes to stay on good terms. Be firm in your decision. After having the conversation, you might think you two are cool and start acting friendly, but if he had feelings for you at some point, they might get rekindled and he might get his hopes up again.
Remember to keep your distance and be firm if he ever tries to flirt with you next time. Open up the issue to your boyfriend. Honesty is a key element in a relationship. If you already had the talk with the best friend, you should tell your boyfriend how it went.
Keeping things transparent with your Dating the guy your best friend likes will help avoid any future misunderstanding that you might have done things behind his back. Note that if his best friend openly asked you out or told you about his feelings, it is almost never safe to keep this from your boyfriend. He might find out later and feel betrayed that you and his best friend kept something so big from him. Assure your boyfriend of your commitment.
After you mention a competitor who is so close to him, your boyfriend might get insecure about losing you.
Make it clear to your boyfriend that you have absolutely no interest in anyone else Dating the guy your best friend likes him. Be ready for the consequences. You should know that confronting the situation with your boyfriend, his best friend, or both will likely involve some consequences. Once he knows, your boyfriend might get in a fight with his best friend, which may or may not end their friendship.
If their friendship ends, know that it is not your fault, but also try not to intentionally contribute to the end of their friendship by talking bad about the friend or ordering your boyfriend to cut his ties.
If you do so, he might resent you for it later. Spend less time with the best friend, at least initially. After confronting the situation, things might Dating the guy your best friend likes awkward among the three of you. This is only natural and giving each other some space is often the best solution.
Try to limit the time you and your boyfriend spend with his best friend, at least for a while. The two of them can hang out anytime, but try not to always join them. Physical distance will help cool things down. Give the friend emotional space.
He probably had feelings for you and has just gotten a rejection. Try to give him some emotional space to get over his crush on you. Avoid shoving your relationship in his face. It is one thing to let him know who you are with, and another to shove it in his face on every single opportunity.
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Keep it cool and move on. After giving the friend some space and while watching your boundaries, see if you can leave this in the past and move on. What if the friend goes to the school counselor about it and tells her everything, and my boyfriend gets in trouble? What would your boyfriend be getting in trouble for? Unless your school has a policy against students dating, there's no rule against someone dating their friend's crush though it may break unstated "friend codes", depending on the friend circle.
If your boyfriend and his friend are having enough conflict over this for his friend to start Dating the guy your best friend likes to get him in trouble or keep him away from you, then it's likely the friend is struggling with severe jealousy, and it would be a good idea to keep distance from the friend.
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Tips Talking face-to-face will be more helpful in showing your sincere feelings rather than texting or calling. If things get messy and the other party starts yelling, don't be a part of it!
Fighting is not the answer. Try to reason with him and stay calm. All in all, show your commitment to your guy and keep a cordial distance with his best friend, and whatever happens beyond that is out of your control. Dating Print Edit Send fan mail to authors. Did this article help you? Cookies make wikiHow better.