Your ex broke up with you and left you heartbroken. And while you are still trying to understand what happened and pick up the shattered pieces of your life, your ex has started another relationship. However, you are still not convinced. Your ex seems happy and their new relationship seems to be going perfectly. And the thought of it just being a rebound relationship is very comforting.
The first sign is quite obvious. Some people jump from one relationship to another without waiting at all. On the other hand, it could be that your ex waited months before entering the new relationship and it could still be a rebound depending if they never really got over you.
If their behavior resembles that of a person in a rebound relationship, you can be know for sure whether or not you have a chance at getting back What to do when your ex starts dating someone. You will not be obsessing over them so much and you will be able to concentrate on your happiness more.
A rebound relationship is simply an attempt to fill a hole in your life that was left by an ex. Another way to describe a rebound relationship is an attempt to avoid the pain of the breakup.
Being intimately close to someone gives us a feeling of security and a boost to our self-esteem. After a breakup, that intimacy is gone in a matter of few days and you are left feeling empty. A rebound relationship gives you hope. It gives you a chance to feel that level of intimacy again.
It gives you hope to fill that empty feeling inside you. This is the reason why most of the rebound relationships seem to move so fast. Because a rebound relationship is an attempt to reach the level of intimacy that only long-term relationships have. Suppose the name of your ex is Jane. Jane feels empty after she left you.
She has an old friend Garry who comforts her, she finds herself attracted to him. She feels that perhaps this guy can make all her pain and the emptiness go away. So she starts dating him.
Whenever she is with him, her mind is not thinking about the breakup and you. But still whenever she is alone, the pain comes back. She thinks if Garry and her start having sex, she will feel much closer to Garry and perhaps forget you. So they start sleeping together. Even though the sex is great, she is still not at peace with herself. At this point, most people realize that this new relationship will not bring them the peace and happiness they were hoping it would.
But Jane is having a hard time accepting that.
She thinks that the new relationship, despite not being what she expected, is still giving her some level of comfort. She continues her relationship, in hope that her level of intimacy with Garry will increase and the empty feeling inside her will slowly go away. She makes pathetic attempts to move the relationship faster hoping that she can gain the same level of intimacy that comes from long-term relationship. But yet, here she is, rushing a relationship faster than a speeding bullet.
The story of Jane demonstrates a classic rebound behavior.
Eventually, Jane would breakup with Garry and will try to deal with her breakup pain. She might feel that she is in love with Garry because Garry provides her with comfort and an escape from the pain that she desires deeply.
Garry is a temporary solution that is alleviating the pain, but he is not the cure. But soon enough, she will realize her relationship with Garry for what it is. She is still empty and she can only be at peace with herself when she decides to face the breakup pain.
And after they breakup with you, they start a relationship with someone who has no career and What to do when your ex starts dating someone life goals whatsoever.
In some cases, your ex will choose someone who is completely opposite of you in every possible way. This is again, very common rebound behavior. The reason behind this behavior is overcompensation. They think that finding someone completely opposite will probably give them happiness. Someone who is not even compatible with their life goal. Someone who is not even their type. They are not thinking of a long-term relationship.
They are thinking of a short term rebound relationship which will hopefully help them get over the breakup. A very common sign of a rebound relationship is whether or not they are trying to rub in your face. One of the most common indicators of this behavior is their social media profile Facebook, twitter etc.
Of course, this behavior is subjective. You know your ex better than anyone, so you are the best judge if they are doing it to rub it in your face or not. One of the examples of this social media behavior that I want to share came from one of my readers. She posted on his Facebook wall whether or not he wants to move to Australia with her next year when she wants to do her PhD.
How can she go for some guy who has no plan for his future and could move to another country just like that? She always said she wanted someone who has some goals in life.
First of all, which couple discusses big life decision on their Facebook wall? She clearly posted this message for her ex to see.
Which shows she is not over him and is most probably in a rebound. On the other end of the spectrum, there are exes who will try to hide their new relationship from you. This is fairly uncommon and What to do when your ex starts dating someone could mean two things. After all, you know your ex and your situation better than anyone else. If they are in a rebound, you still have to apply the no contact rule and follow the 5-step plan.
If you are looking to get your ex girlfriend or ex wife back, then you should check out this article. It will be the most comprehensive guide you will ever read and it will give you objectives you can set for yourself as you are moving forward in this journey to get your ex girlfriend back.
In addition, you might also want to read this article on what to do if your ex boyfriend is in another relationship. Scroll down to read the comments. Before commenting, read commenting guidelines. Basically the girl i dated ended things with me to go back to her ex.
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I'm very confused because I dont know if i was the rebound or is he? She dated me in july after breaking up with her ex in april It's a little hard to tell for certain and it would depend on who she feels more connected to at the end of the day. Based on the situation though, there's a possibility that you were the rebound, because even though she gave more to you, she still felt connected enough to her ex to end up leaving the relationship to be with him.
What will i do?
Do I still need to hold on? Has there ever been a consideration to reduce the distance and begin living together eventually, considering that you have a 2 year old daughter with him? If distance is the issue here which caused him to get intimate with someone else, this is something that has to be considered before you think about winning him back.
Also, you'll have to do what's best for you and your kid, and I personally wouldn't recommend simply holding on for the sake of it.
I was in a 3 year relationship. We parted ways back in Marchbut it wasn't a "real" breakup. We just decided we didn't get along anymore and would be better off on our own, which was the stupidest thing to do. We kept on seeing each other, calling, texting, etc. This changed in June. I noticed a change in her approach, as if her focus shifted. She didn't speak to me the way she used to and kept breaking up text conversations in the middle.
I felt she was slipping away, but did nothing about it.
I reached out like three times and then my pride took over and I was like: We talked briefly and then hours later when I saw her alone I grabbed her and told her I love her and asked if she's happy with him. A week later I left a love letter and a bunch of pictures of us throughout the years at her house and spoke to her mum.
She texted me the next day saying that she still thinks of me, but a lot of time has passed and things are not what they used to be. She said that she wants to speak to me, but she's not ready to have that conversation yet.