I share my own experiences in the hope they bring a sense of solidarity and even a smile, because fun is a part of life too. I am a pretty positive person and believ e everyone has goodness in them, somewhere. So I write this with love on behalf of the single women in Sydney.
Occasionally, people say I am funny too. I have mostly been single for a few years and I wondered if my country NSW accent was holding me back, except that I know a LOT of other incredibly smart, fit, attractive and interesting ladies who are all in the same non-love boat.
I am even willing to let a man take a spin on my motorbike as a free gift with purchase. Or are lucky enough to enjoy a night of passion and it melts their brains or something. Or worse still, ladies become so used to this behaviour that when a man actually replies to a text, they get overexcited and settle for the douchebag they scraped from the bottom of the locally distilled small batch gin barrel. I ended up as a doormat once and it was no trip to Messina. I just got back from Melbourne and the men regardless of their relationship status spoke to me like a woman.
Which is nice because it reminded me I am a woman. I mean in Melbourne. I would move in a heartbeat except I am allergic to winter.
I am not saying all women are angels and men are not. But the ratio of single ladies: I am an ideas woman and like to fix stuff, so naturally I have an epic plan. You are not going to like it, but I implore you to keep reading. We will tee up a prisoner exchange type deal, luring you and your Sydney friends to Melbourne to be turned back into real gentlemen maybe we will bribe you with frequent flyer points?
Bull is my neighbour so I pitched him my plan, but he is a bit busy at the mo. Something about an election.
So until a single Melbourne man becomes our next PM realistically this could happen next weekI write this letter in the hope of improving intergender and interstate relations. I am very inquisitive and genuinely curious to better understand the male species. What really goes on behind those beards? If there is something dealbreakingly wrong with the women of Sydney is it about the activewear?
We are open to genuine and helpful feedback. If you are fearful of becoming an Instagram husband, I empathise. I wonder if we have all become so swept up in a whirlwind romance with technology that sometimes it is hard to remember how to communicate with a real human. So I thought it might be helpful to share a few insights.